Dr., it hurts when I put down my iPhone

By Jeremy Herring

It was not a scientifically-sourced article, but it was entertaining enough to read. Bob Greene in his CNN opinion article, “Don't Sleep with Your Smart Phone Nearby” cited anecdotal evidence and the perspectives of many others who have recognized in themselves and those around them the unofficial symptoms of "Digital Codependence" – the addiction arising from our society obsessed with ever-connected high-tech devices. We often only come to realize that these devices in our possession actually leverage unrivaled control over us when we are forced to put them down and that undeniable emptiness begins to set in. The symptoms range from the temptation to check for new messages throughout the night to a feeling of incompleteness until an activity has been shared with the world via status message update or tweet. 

Have you ever recognized any of these symptoms in yourself or others?

• Nagging feeling of isolation, anxiety or being disconnected from the world when separated from phones, computers, the Internet, etc., for an extended period of time…

• Walking while looking at a mobile device – instead of looking at where you are going…

• Compulsive need to check for new emails, messages or updates even when there has been no notification…

• Urge to pick up and look at the phone in the midst of a face-to-face conversation…

• Texting while someone is talking to you…

• Inability to remember phone numbers or email addresses and must rely on contact lists or address books built into mobile devices…

• Frustration with the complexity or inability of all your devices to synchronize everything from apps to addresses to notes to calendars to email accounts to frequently-used files…

• Keeping a laptop, smart phone or tablet nearby when watching television in order to research facts or trivia about the program…

• Inability to NOT multitask, for instance reading the news or emails while watching television…

• Phantom vibration in your pocket even when the phone is not there…

• Tendency to look at the phone only moments before a call or text notification appears, almost like cell phone premonition that the notification was about to arrive…

• Vague feeling of incompleteness of an activity until it has been shared on Facebook or Twitter, including the need to "check in" when arriving at a destination…

• Unconsciously composing messages, replies and posts in the midst of an activity in anticipation of posting it later…

• Inability to entertain yourself when idle, such as waiting for a flight, riding in a car or during a meeting / presentation / class…

• Inability to perform "critical analysis" thinking without the aid of a software application to help organize your thoughts…

Addiction is diagnosed “when people or activities in your life begin to suffer as a result of something you know you should cut back on but don’t.” Under that definition, much of our relationship with our mobile devices could certainly be categorized as addiction. Here are a few common sense guidelines you may want to implement in order to keep the addictive patterns in check:

• Establish "offline" hours and make them known to your family and friends … no calls or texts before or after set hours of the day – and no expectation of responses during offline times (barring genuine emergencies).

• Store / charge all electronic devices in another room from where you sleep – no cell phones, tablets or laptops in the bedroom once the lights go out.

• Respect people enough to pay attention to them when they are talking to you face-to-face and not the device in front of you … in fact, put it on silent and put it in your pocket to avoid temptation.

• Respect family time and turn off the mobile phone if possible / permissible. (it is understandable that some occupations require certain employees to be "always available").

• If it is absolutely necessary to take a call or respond to a message during a meeting, dinner or social event, politeness dictates that you excuse yourself from the social setting to at least a semi-private place in order to avoid imposing your electronic conversation on the group, as they are not afforded the opportunity to participate (this also respects the potential sensitivity of the matter in question).

• Similar to movie theaters, fine dining restaurant etiquette requests that you at least set phones / pagers / PDAs to vibrate in order to avoid detracting from the dining experience of those around you – to you it’s just a notification, but to others, it’s a crying baby at the next table.

• Be aware of the immediate area when you are talking on the phone and also when taking pictures in a public place – I don’t want my discreet dinner date publically posted in the background of your photo album, nor do I want to hear about what your dog just did on the carpet.

Funny guy Jeremy Herring is the business support manager for Helios LLC. He is chiefly responsible for Helios’ media and public communication, as well as overseeing any training initiatives. Herring can be contacted at herringj@gohelios.com.